If you thought this post was going to be about body types, think again. This isn’t about what you look like in a bikini or how much cardio you do. This post is about mindset. Specifically, the mindset that some folks in Nebraska’s swinger scene need to seriously reevaluate.
Let’s be real. The lifestyle is not one size fits all. It never has been, and it never will be. There’s no one “correct” way to be a swinger. There’s no single mold that swinger couples or singles need to fit into. And yet, you’d be surprised how many people seem to think there is.
Compared to other communities our team has worked in, and with experience attending events across the country (and even around the world), we can confidently say Nebraska still has some growing up to do. And no, we’re not talking about age. We’re talking about attitude.
Right now, there are at least three distinct generations active in the lifestyle. From Boomers to Gen Z, each group brings its own energy, preferences, and values to the table. That diversity should be celebrated, not side-eyed. Different people, different backgrounds, different relationship styles… that’s the beauty of it. You can’t expect a Boomer couple looking for soft swap to vibe the same way as a polyamorous, pansexual throuple from Gen Z. And you know what? That’s okay.
The lifestyle isn’t just about hookups anymore. Sure, “sport sex” is still part of it for many, but these days, the conversation has expanded. Ethical nonmonogamy is reshaping what it means to be “in the lifestyle.” People are forming deeper connections, exploring new dynamics, and rewriting the rules in ways that work for them. And honestly? That’s amazing.
But despite all the progress, there are still pockets of judgment. Especially in places where the scene is smaller and more insular. You’ve got people rolling their eyes at anything that doesn’t look like their version of swinging. People who still think the hotwife space is taboo or that single men have no place at events. People who form cliques, gossip behind closed doors, and treat newcomers like they have to prove themselves to be accepted.
Here’s the truth. That kind of gatekeeping has no place in the lifestyle anymore.
As long as everyone involved is a consenting adult, no one’s being harmed, and the vibe is respectful—let people do their thing. Whether someone wants to attend parties just to watch, explore kink, play selectively, or dive into polyamory, it’s all valid. The moment you start trying to box people in is the moment you miss out on what makes this community so unique.
Let’s stop pretending there’s one right way to be a swinger.
Let’s normalize communication over competition, curiosity over cliques, and acceptance over assumptions. Let’s create spaces where people feel welcome regardless of how they show up in the lifestyle, because that’s how you build a real community—not just a social club.
And for those out there still judging others or clinging to the idea that swinging only looks one way? You’re on the wrong side of where this lifestyle is headed. The world is changing. People are changing. The lifestyle is evolving. Keep up or get left behind in the corner playing with yourself. (No pun intended… okay, maybe a little.)
Bottom line? The swinger lifestyle is not one size fits all. And that’s exactly what makes it so exciting.
